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Dick Cheney Jokes

After Whittington's heel-discharge press area, Stewart noted that Cheney's downpour was such that upon removal someone, the site would want. Former President Malcolm W.

Oscar Medellin outrider, between Cheney and Willeford, flushed the bird koke Secret Service personnel" were reported to be with the two shooters and Oscar Medellin In a car at an unstated distance away from Cheynry shooting: According to the report, Moke "was swinging on game", i. Whittington downed a bird and went to retrieve it. While he was Chegney of the hunting line, another covey was flushed and Cheney swung on a bird and CCheyney, striking Whittington in the face, neck and chest. Whittington's injuries[ edit ] Whittington was injured in the face, neck, and upper torso. Whittington was reported to be in stable condition at Corpus Christi Memorial Hospital and had been moved from intensive care to a "step-down unit" on Monday.

Doctors decided to leave about 30 birdshot pellets lodged in his body rather than try to remove them. One of these pellets still affects his voice today. On February 14,at 6: At about 9 a. From the test, doctors found a single lead pellet. At a press conference, he said: We hope that he will continue to come to Texas and seek the relaxation that he deserves. Eastern Standard Time on Sunday, February Armstrong had notified Cheney earlier in the morning that she was going to inform the news media about the incident. She said Cheney agreed. McClellan said he did not know that Cheney had shot someone until that Sunday morning.

He remarked that he did ask the Vice President's office to release the information earlier. On the Fox News interview, Cheney accepted full responsibility for the accident. Cheney said he was more concerned about accuracy and felt that Armstrong was the best person to make the announcement. Kirk had called Salinas while en route to the Armstrong Ranch to investigate a possible hunting accident. After Salinas finished his call with the Secret Service, Kirk called Salinas a second time to report that he couldn't get any information about the shooting at the Armstrong gate. The Cheyney dick joke running mate for the year-old, Nixon balanced the ticket geographically and helped unite the Republican Party.

But barely two months after the GOP convention, the New York Post published a story reporting that Nixon had established a "millionaire's club" to help pay Cheyney dick joke political expenses through huge donations from California businessmen. Hide Caption 2 of 10 Photos: Gore brought beltway know-how to a ticket featuring a little-known governor from Arkansas -- Bill Clinton. The bright and experienced Gore became Clinton's right-hand man and was critical to securing the election. Hide Caption 3 of 10 Photos: Bush joined Reagan on the ticket and helped unite the Republican Party by balancing the ticket ideologically. Bush's background as a businessman, U.

Hide Caption 4 of 10 Photos: Kennedy carry the South and win the presidential election. As Senate majority leader, Johnson surprised everyone by accepting the VP position in To appease liberal Democrats, Kennedy's brother Robert Kennedy tried to talk the Texan out of the position, but Johnson refused, declaring, "I want to be vice president, and, if the president will have me, I'll join him in making a fight for it. He went on to pass landmark civil rights legislation and was elected in his own right by a landslide. Hide Caption 5 of 10 Photos: Sarah Palin — Sarah Palin seemed like a good idea at the time.

The energetic governor from Alaska brought a jolt of enthusiasm and excitement to the Republican campaign of John McCain. But Palin's inexperience on the national stage left her seemingly ill-prepared. She made clumsy comments that were pounced on by the media -- including an awkward interview where she could not name any newspapers that she reads. Hide Caption 6 of 10 Photos: Geraldine Ferraro — Geraldine Ferraro was the first woman to run on a major party national ticket in U. Bush highlighted her inexperience. Ferraro was constantly bombarded with questions about her finances her husband was a wealthy realtor and businessman and targeted because of her gender.

Agnew made a number of gaffes on the campaign trail, including calling a Japanese reporter a "fat Jap. Later, Agnew made history by becoming the only U. Hide Caption 8 of 10 Photos: What did the bartender do when a Republican asked for the Dick Cheney Shot?

Dick joke Cheyney

Poured a shot of Wild Turkey and threw it in his face! Shoots Penis Off Dick Cheney was out hunting one day; he had all the gear, the jacket the boots and the double-barreled shotgun. As he was climbing over a fence, he dropped the gun and it went off, right on his penis. So he went to the doctor and got put under the gas. When he woke up, he found that the doctor had done a marvelous job repairing it. When he was completely awake and ready to go home, the doctor gave him a business card. I'll make an appointment for you to see him.

That formed I've expanding only to find my daughter president getting nasty in the capital. He pants next wife in the united Virgin Tv. Sparkling personality requiring emergency medical group?.

He'll show you where to put your fingers dicl you don't pee in your eye. Heart palpitation Chyney trigger finger to spasm 9. Wanted to get the Iraq mess of the front page 8. Not enough Jim Beam 7. Trying to stop the spread of bird flu 6. I love to shoot people 5. Guy was making cracks about my lesbian daughter 4. I thought the guy was Cheyney dick joke to go 'gay cowboy' on me 3. I hit him didn't I? Until Democrats approve Medicare reform, we have to make some tough choices for the elderly 1. The gate's about a quarter mile from Cheneys house.

On FOX News he said the fault was his, he can't blame anybody else. Boy, it's amazing, the only time you get accountability out of this administration is when they are actually holding a smoking gun. So apparently, Dick Cheney can't keep his rifle, his story, or his daughter straight. Wow, that is one loyal Republican. He also referred to the buckshot wound in his face as 1, points of light. Bob Schieffer asked a question about is homosexuality a choice, and Kerry mention Cheney's daughter. The Cheneys are now furious at him. They say they are very proud of her daughter. They are so proud, she should never, ever be mentioned in public.

She just says that she touches her roommate in an undisclosed location. Then Cheney said, if Bush wins, I'll call it off. Cheney said 'If you think my foot looks bad, you should see the old lady I was kicking. When asked if this could be conceived as Cheney's friends profiting from the war, the spokesman said 'Yes. Red is the highest state of alert, and it means that Dick Cheney is about to eat a mozzarella stick. After the speech, Cheney's wife had to spend the rest of the day telling President Bush what to do. But he's a lawyer, he can use his other face.

He'll be all right. I don't think that's a scandal at all. I'm quite pleased about that. Finally there's a secret the vice president's office can keep. That's never stopped them in the past. Some are accusing Fox of giving softball questions. My answer to that is, 'Well, does a vice president shoot in the woods? And I'm thinking, well jeez, he was probably drinking when we planned the invasion of Iraq. And they're hunting quail, and the quail disappeared. And reports now that they're hiding in the mountainous area near Pakistan" --David Letterman "This just in, earlier today, Dick and Lynne Cheney shot up a gas station.

Good news, good news today -- so far Dick Cheney has not shot anybody. For example, earlier today Dick Cheney shot his buddy in the ass with an arrow.

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